Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Tracey's Triangle - Bah Humbug


I love Christmas, and Christmas Songs. There are a couple I could do without though.
SO here is my Bah Humbug list of the worst songs out there.


WINNER
Do They Know it's Christmas? - Bandaid
Disclaimer: I know this song was written to help Ethiopia, raise money and awareness which it did, and that's great. I always want to help the Starvin' Marvin's of the world but lets just look at the lyrics shall we...


And the Christmas bells that ring there 
Are the clanging chimes of doom  
We'll, tonight, thank God, 
it's them instead of you
And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time 

The greatest gift they'll get this year is life 
Where nothing ever grows, no rain or rivers flow  
Do they know it's Christmas time at all?

First a couple of legislates:.
No. No they don't know it's Christmas, They don't celebrate it.
and of course it's not snowing, it's their summer.
Second, Clanging chimes of doom?
What is this the end of the world, I know we're lucky and the rest of the world may not be.
what's wrong with saying something like "Share your good fortune" "Give more than presents this year, give hope" "Spread the Merry Cheer with Someone who's not near" Hey that even rhymes.
Third, Thank God it's them instead of you?
WHAT MESSAGE ARE YOU SENDING??
Fourth, the greatest gift they'll get is life?
They way they say it sounds like yeah they won't get an big screen TV, how stupid are they, all they are thankful for is life? Way to get into the materialism Bandaid.
and Lastly, "feed. the. WOOOOoooorld" 
 is just a shrill melody that gets me like nails on a chalk board.

Runner Up

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

What a laugh it would have been
If daddy had only seen
Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night.


The idea is cute, and we know that santa is actually the dad, (right? we hope?)
but the little kid doesn't know that, neither do kids listening to the song
So what is cheating okay? I mean as long as it's with Santa, they'll keep you quiet with toys.

I actually don't mind this song, it's fun. (and suppose if I truly condoned this song I would have to condone Grandma got runover by a Reindeer and Santa would have to be written up for a Hit and Run.)

I do have a problem with the Jackson 5's version. 
I don't really have a good reason, except that  it annoys me. If I have to listen to:
 I did! I did! I really did see Mommy kissing Santa Claus
You gotta believe me! You just gotta believe me!
Come on, fellas, believe me! 

One more time. Ugh

Honorable mentioned goes to:
Christmas Wrapping - The Waitresses
(Didn't even know that was a group I assumed the song was sung by The Bangles)
Reason: It's long and complicated.
             Are they trying to have a play on words with wrapping for rapping?


Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah this year.

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